Witness(06-12-8)

1.Reflection
2nd-3rd Dec.
This season is always too sorrow to keep life.The leaves have almost expired,so did I.My confidence has been peeled off.
Nothing special happened.Watched DVD,the cartoon "Conan" and "EVA",instead of any kinds of books.Went to bed at AM7:00 on time everyday,and up at pm 2:00,round and round.
Angela said she would go for internship in CITS.
Jacob took penned-interview in Xin Hua agency.If I could have cought the chance to deliever resume,would I be picked out?
Jack said he sold himself to a MICE company and will intern till the end of this semester,then they will negotiate for sallary.
How about me?I am just watching cartoon despondingly,while others are fighting for their destiny.However,what should I do.
4th Dec.
Started to play Winning Eleven,and slaughtered Real Madrid for 8 goals.That's a coincidence that I will play WE4 when I am disapointed and misoriented.So long as being in such low spirit,I am custommed to trumb the articles for pastime.
I believe that should be another time I am disapointed and misoriented,and I recognize that it is not the coincidence.
Decided to ponder the reason of silience.
Interview.Nestle's failure was a numerous shock for me.I was swamped by the inferiority even though I exerted myself to keep active after that.The narrow view made me lose the fragile confidence established by 3 years.Then comes to the interview of CITS where I was insulted at.Different from Nestle,I was not defeated by the interview itself but the prejudice.Nevertheless,I can't admit myself to live in the nasty surrounding.Angela said she has been depressed since the interview of Singapore Travel Bureau.She changed her mind that she got down to the companies giving her confidence and honour,but not the giant in their field.She said I need the honour and respect from others rarely obtained from the giant companies,according her understanding of me.I admitted that I was shaked by her says.
Overseas education.The world outside must be better than here?No friends,no relatives,pale life,pale future.taking one more piece of certificate is the only advantage.I have to be back,owing to the harsh policy.What a pathetic choice.The analysis for future,which I made a year ago and always been crew over to friends,said overseas education will be the last choice in the three,while I forgot the result when I made the decision.
Major.Do I have any right to make decision as all the roads are merely blind lane.Computer,Finance,English,Mathematics.4 majors but not 4 subjects,and every major is comprised by several courses.I intend to expire myself when I am in library.
People.Don't speak up anymore due to many people's concern,and the feeling was boosted by fury as well.However,there is no denying that is the key point of disappointment.The judgement in the heart will carry out if there is no sense of importance of myself.
Pastime.Two weeks ago's Reading former articles means another call-to-accout.Ge,Licky,Xue,PR tong,Angela,Jacob,high school,dorm.Merely stayed in the stuffiness when I turned over the articles which has never been trumbed for over a year.The interview with Licky in CITS has been proved that must be my doom.I can't recognized the I a few years ago.The I might look down upon me present.
I hate to be biased.I hate frustration.So I hate myself.
5th Dec.
Started to take "invstment banking" again,even though the pages I covered was quite limited.
Judy persuaded me to perk up again.I had to say,I am trying.
6th Dec.
Accomplished the 100 items for only 8 minutes in the highway code exam and got a full mark.But the anxiety before the exam hinted that I lost most of confidence.
Reading some pages signs the perk up?I don't know.
Send E-mail to the person who takes charge of the affair of US's enrolement,and requested him to exempt one more course,which can save merely 3000 Aus.$,equal to 18000RMB,even though it seems impposible.
Zhi Yi advised we could go for roller in Yue Tan to celebrate their birthdays as well as PR tong's.Did support since that's their first time to speak out their point of view.What's more,it is quite close to 35 elementary shool.
Richard faddled that "the world has not belonged to you" when I gave him a call.I realized that I located in an awkard position with solemnness.
Wrote the new article for Ge's birthday.Haven't written the proselike this for long time.
7th Dec.
Trimmed the article for Ge several times,since I was even not confident to my brilliance of writting.
Decided to be back on Sunday,if no emergency.
Enforced myself to translate all the reflection into English,to paractice the familarity of the active words.That's should be the beginning.
Father was back yesterday,and mother will go on errands today.She can't be back before my departure.
Was addicted by Beethoven's Missa solemnis Op.123,the only one that can take the place of Requiem, K 626 composed by mozart Wolfgang Amadeus.
8th Dec.
No more thing can be more significant than Ge's birthday.this day's refletion will record no more things except for this.
Happy birthday,my best friend.
2.Jacob send the message ended by "MVA".I asked him what it is with vain thought.I started insane after I knew the meaning of the 3 letters.It was created by Licky,and fullly filled in my cellphone 2 years ago.Deserted by doom is not horrible,but will be horrible enough if by pastime.
3.I am searching the one who hited my 5000th view,please told me if you are,or I will check your IP.
4.two weeks.The adjustment is not successful at all.Idleness needs any excuse?
5.Judy send back the message written by myself when I persuaded her.Humanbeing always keep reason when sermonrizing others.
6.Ge's birthday.That may be the last time to celebrate birthday for him.I will depart in the mid of July.Massive things will become the last time,even concluding some meet with someone in the last half of year.
7.I will be back.Have you ever missed me.